B.L.U.R (Episode 1 - Transportation)

"The eyes are useless when the mind is blind." 

                                                                                                                                

I am not sure how many of us have started losing our mind after 3 weeks of MCO (Movement Control Order) here in Malaysia.

During this period, most if not all of our routines have to be rescheduled and/or are compromised. It is not surprising, then, to catch ourselves spacing out occasionally.

Nonetheless, MCO or not, we have all had our episodes of being BLUR, or being absent-minded at some point in our lives.

I revisited one of my 2014 blog posts about wardrobe malfunction and I thought, hey, why not record an entry on transportation blunders this time round? Maybe, just maybe, the next few minutes of MCO might then become slightly more bearable after you have laughed at all these embarrassing, but true stories. 

Have you ever mistaken someone else's car as your own? After all, it could have been the same model, the same colour, and even almost the same car plate.

Apparently, that was what my father had done at the carpark of Alamanda Shopping Centre in Putrajaya, many years ago. To cut him some slack, Dad has been diagnosed with glaucoma for more than 2 decades now and his eyesight has been failing. But one thing that faileth not is his level of confidence, or ignorance (which can sometimes drive us really, really mad, if you know what I mean...).

My mother and my brother were already in the car, waiting for Dad when they caught him striding confidently towards what he assumed was my brother's car back then: a black Proton Wira. It was parked just next to my brother's car. As both of them observed Dad through the windows, they too had confidently assumed that he would surely not be able to open the car door or get into that car anyway and would therefore know that it was the wrong car, even though the two cars may have looked very similar. Alas, how their jaw dropped when he was not only able to open the car door, but to actually get in and comfortably take his seat!

Tell me, what were the odds that a random driver, who drove the same car as my brother, would have coincidentally left his car unlocked in that parking lot, only to let my Dad 'break in', albeit unintentionally?!! He sat in the car for a while before realising that my brother and my mom were laughing hysterically from the car next door.

Not too long ago, I dropped my parents off at the hospital for their routine check-up. Instead of parking at the hospital and waiting with them, I would usually take a walk in the park or hang around nearby to wait for their phone call. Not long after calling me, my mom (the other half with the supposedly better eyesight) saw a silver Perodua Myvi approaching and thought I had arrived. As she tried to open the car door, two other young girls rushed towards the Myvi and explained to my mom that it was their Grab ride, and not hers.

I am sure my parents are not exclusive in this.

I recall a teacher back in secondary school who confessed that she once entered into the wrong car while waiting for her husband to pick her up from work. She thought the car looked familiar, so when it pulled up, she automatically opened the door and got in. When the driver refused to drive away, she turned to look at him and asked, "What are you waiting for?" Imagine her embarrassment and horror when she eventually realized that the driver wasn't her husband at all!

Looks like there are already three embarrassing stories, and I have only touched on the topic of getting into the wrong car. What about other modes of transportation, you ask? Let's see how the humble public bus can teach us a lesson or two on humility.

Because we lived far in the suburbs but studied right in the heart of town, it was never easy for my brother and I to catch the public transport after school, unless we took the KL-Kajang bus or even the KL-Seremban bus and walked from the main highway to the housing estate. On the way home from school one day, my brother overslept and found himself in Kajang. I was on the verge of calling my parents to let them know that perhaps something bad had happened to him since he was taking much longer than usual, when the house phone rang and I heard his voice over the public phone, sheepishly explaining the blunder. Well, at least that was still much better than waking up in Seremban town!

This is City Liner no. 843, the most difficult bus to catch. I am surprised I managed to steal this image from the Internet.

A classmate, J, was telling our group how she had seen her mini bus coming from afar, but had subconsciously joined the queue for another bus which was already in the midst of picking up passengers from the bus stop. Since the interior of all mini buses looked alike, she had not suspected anything amiss at first. After a while, it slowly dawned on her that the bus was taking a different route altogether. Needless to say, she had to get off the bus prematurely. I can still recall how we guffawed at her tale while we were in the classroom that day. It had seemed really silly and careless even though it was a classic, typical error in eye-foot coordination.

"What goes around comes around." 

I learned the above lesson the following day when another classmate, C, quietly confided in me that she herself had taken the wrong bus that afternoon immediately after laughing at J's story. She had also seen her bus coming from afar but had somehow gotten into the wrong bus. Luckily for her, though, the bus was going in the same direction as her home, just not close enough. She decided to get off and walk all the way home under the scorching sun, more to save herself from the embarrassment than to save her bus fare. How could she recount the tale to others after having laughed so loudly the day before?

I didn't dare laugh at her story after that. You see, I still had my own bus to catch that afternoon, too.

But I guess one of the most embarrassing bus episodes happened to my friend's mom.

Here is an obvious, yet unwritten rule: if you are someone who normally drives to your destination and enjoys the comfort of your own vehicle, you will find it very awkward to switch to public transport. Not only do you need to study which bus/train to take, which interchange to get down at, and how to make payment (trust me, it can be rocket science to some people), you will also quickly need to master the art of maintaining your center of gravity while the bus driver takes you on a roller-coaster ride. Rid yourselves of romantic bus scenes where the male lead towers protectively over the female lead and catches her the moment she loses her balance. In reality, there is just no one to catch you if you fall.

My friend's mother found herself in one such predicament when she had to take the public bus one day. Just as the driver was taking a corner, or jamming on the brakes, she felt her balance suddenly dissipating from her body, so she quickly wrapped her fingers around a cold, stainless steel pole near her. Strangely enough, the pole did not provide the support she had anticipated. In fact, it was swaying along with her! She turned to look at it again and as her eyes traced the end of that 'pole', she realised that she was actually not holding onto the sturdy pole in the middle of the bus, but was clutching steadfastly on to another passenger's crutches! No wonder it had kept moving about...

I cannot recall if she had accidentally sat on any passengers that day. But my friend told me that her mom was extremely apologetic to the passenger with the crutches. Good thing she was not a regular passenger on the bus. It would have been quite embarrassing to bump into the same person (or anyone else in the bus that day) ever again.

I actually do have many other embarrassing stories, specifically regarding drivers and their own vehicles but perhaps, in the same way food is rationed during MCO, I should also ration my stories and save it for the next entry.

In the meantime, I hope you were somewhat entertained.

Stay at home, stay safe, and most importantly, stay SANE!

5 Words I Only Learned in Adulthood

My colleague once told me how an 8 year-old neighour persuaded her then 10-year-old nephew to key in the letters S.E.X while surfing the Internet. My first thought? I doubt if I knew how to spell the word SEX when I was eight (yes, I was a very slow learner when it came to reading), let alone understand what that word entails.

But oh, how the times have changed! Thanks to the Internet, TV, iPad, and mobile phones, kids these days are exposed to practically everything, at times to their greater disadvantage.

Here are five very ordinary words that I only got to learn as an adult.


#1 Decapitate

Back when we were still in school, the only form of death penalty we had ever heard of was "gantung sampai mati" (hanged to death), and it was a punishment befitting a murderer or a drug addict/pusher. It was only in my higher secondary school years that I discovered the word "noose" was in actual fact, NOT a misspelling of the organ, "nose".

As an adult, though, and with the rise of ISIS and other extremist groups, another word has made its way into the tabloid, TV, radio and other media i.e. the verb to DECAPITATE.

Teddy Biscuits

One of my friends' three-year-old daughter shared her teddy biscuits with me one day and as she snapped off the head (of the teddy biscuit, of course!), I casually remarked, "Oh look, you have just decapitated the bear!"

In my defense, I do not have kids of my own, so I naturally forget to put on my G-rated filters whenever I speak to them. This little girl paused for a short while and looked at me. I thought the episode was over until my friend texted me the very next morning saying, "Thanks to you, my three-year-old just used the word DECAPITATE during breakfast!"

Whoops! It was highly unintentional. Moral of the story? Always keep your kids away from Aunty Lilian...


#2 Epicentre

One of the very few things I recall from Geography lessons is the fact that our beloved country, Malaysia, does not rest on the "Lingkaran Gunung Berapi Pasifik" (the Pacific Ring of Fire). We have been constantly reminded that our nation is indeed very blessed because we did not experience earthquakes and other massive movements of the land and/or sea, unlike many of our neighbouring countries.

Photo taken from The Star showing image before and after the earthquake

Nonetheless, we have since experienced our fair share of natural disasters such as the tsunami in 2004, Bukit Tinggi earthquakes between 2007-2009, and of course, the 2015 Ranau earthquake that changed the landscape of Mount Kinabalu forever. Whenever any of these disasters occurred, we kept hearing the word, "epicentre" being used very often, in reference to the "point on the earth's surface vertically above the focus of an earthquake."

Of late, though, the word "epicentre" has regained its popularity with the spread of the COVID-19, as a result of Coronavirus. This time, the Hubei province in China has been labelled the epicentre of the disease. Before SARS and MERS-CoV, we haven't had the need to label any location as the epicentre of an epidemic. This shows that the word is no longer exclusive to earthquakes but to any central point of an unpleasant situation. 



#3 Viral

To describe SARS, MERS-CoV, and COVID 19 as viral diseases makes sense. But the word "viral" has transcended beyond its medical usage and has become rather inclusive.

These days, when something goes viral, it may not necessarily refer to diseases. It could be anything that has become very widespread, especially on the Internet. With the technology of pin-hole cameras, coupled with the accessibility of mobile phones and the Internet, practically any incident can be recorded and easily shared to the point of no return. The same goes to pictures and text messages. For that reason, we are now stuck with lots of Fake News circulating in our midst.


#4 Catfish

And then there are some words that I only got to learn after becoming a lecturer and interacting with students who are probably half my age.

Yums, ikan keli sambal cili merah

Whenever I frequent a nasi campur (mixed rice) stall, my eyes cannot resist zooming into the ikan keli (which is usually served fried and blanketed under lots and lots of chilis). Despite its slightly hideous appearance, I simply love the texture of the fish, from its super crunchy deep fried head to its succulent and sweet white flesh enveloping the needle-fine bones.

Oh boy, just thinking about it makes my mouth water...

That, to me, ladies and gentlemen, is what catfish is all about.

Imagine my confusion then when students brought up the term "catfish" as we were discussing the pros and cons of using social media. Apparently, "catfishing" is one of the many dangers that users face online. As far as I was concerned, however, the only catfish in my mind was seducing me from across the table of the nasi campur stall...

If you have no idea what "catfishing" means, you are probably as ancient and outdated as I am (or even more). According to urbandictionary.com, "catfish" is a fake or stolen identity created or used for the purposes of beginning a deceptive relationship. In short, if you happen to be a hamsap (filthy) old man trying to con an innocent young girl online, you should take a good look in the mirror. I mean, you could have transformed into a catfish, unknowingly.


#5 Telegram

One of the more shocking words I learned also has to do with the topic of social media. While asking students to list the types of communication used today, one of the students (a very polite, obliging, and gentle soul) blurted out, "telegram".

I mustered all my sense of control so as not to laugh out loud at what I thought was an extremely outdated suggestion. I had immediately pictured boys or girls in colourful costumes, ringing the doorbell of houses and singing telegram messages. Or at least postcards with very limited number of words (considering it was pretty expensive back then to send one and the payment depended a lot on the number of words).

I thought to myself, "This kid must be living in the 1960s! Who sends telegram these days?"

You see, this was what I had in mind:

An image of what an old telegram would look like (though this is dated 2013)

But this was what he meant:

Telegram: A modern app

Talk about generation gap! At the end of the day, the joke was on me. To this day, I still do not know what is so special about this application, but many people are leaning towards it. Many even claim that it is better than WhatsApp. This goes to show that I should never underestimate my students' knowledge, especially when it involves new slang and terminology.


What about you? Do you have words that you only got to learn as an adult?

In the Blink of an Eye

Ever wondered how things can undergo massive change within a short period of time? 

The legendary Kobe Bryant

About a week ago, the world was shocked by the tragic death of NBA legend, Kobe Bryant. To be honest, I never knew who he was although students have claimed to worship him. It was only after Kobe Bryant's death that my brother gradually introduced me to this outstanding individual. We watched as he led his team to victory in the basketball court:

As you can see towards the end of the clip, the scoreboard shows 107 points, favouring the opposing team against his own team's 105 points, and there is less than a minute left on the clock. Just when you think that the Lakers are going down, Kobe Bryant scores a 3-pointer, leading his team to turn the tables around and win that match by ONE point, at the very LAST second, no less.

I thought such drama was reserved only for movies but apparently Kobe Bryant had perfected this scene many times.

Despite his outstanding achievements and legendary contributions, Kobe Bryant was gone in the blink of an eye. A helicopter crash put an abrupt end to his life. Oh, how things must have changed for his family, friends, and fans in that split second!

That got me thinking … many things and circumstances can (and have) really change(d) within a short span of time.

Take the recent Coronavirus outbreak in Wuhan, for instance. Less than two weeks ago, the whole of China was experiencing mass exodus throughout the nation. Due to the longer Chinese New Year public holidays, many may have planned to go on tours or return to their hometowns to celebrate with their loved ones.

As soon as the outbreak of the virus got out of hand, though, cities were under lockdown and travel restrictions were issued on anyone who has been to or is coming from China. Needless to say, this year's Chinese New Year celebration was quite a sombre affair. Who would have imagined that the situation could change so drastically within a span of 2 weeks? 

Family reunions, business plans, study plans, and much-anticipated holidays were and still are unexpectedly thwarted by the change of events. Individuals and families are trapped in various destinations and are left to deal with the sticky situation. 

On the surface, this may seem to affect only people in/from China, but in reality, it is NOT as simple as that. 

I, for one, have been on the receiving end without even having to leave Malaysia at all. How so, you ask? 

At the start of this auspicious year, while most people were excitedly looking forward to the turn of a new decade, I was experiencing some personal twists and turns in my career. As a part-timer, I have been given the opportunity to teach at 2 new places. One involves exchange students from South Korea, while the other has many students originating from mainland China. (I bet you know where this entry is heading, haha!)

The one-month student exchange programme was scheduled to start yesterday. Unfortunately, we were suddenly informed late last Friday evening that the entire programme had to be called off due to travel restrictions on the South Korean students.

To say that I was not disappointed would be a lie. As a result of low student intake and cost cutting measures in many educational institutions, classes have reduced quite significantly in the past few months, so I was actually looking forward to these new places (and faces).

And of course, there is always an unexplained charm that awaits any new adventure, don't you agree?

With the anticipation as well as anxiety of a kid who is getting ready to go to school for the very first time, I had not only prepared for classes but also made plans for my meals and journey there. The preparation was not only on my part, but also on the part of the administrative staff. Since we were all part-timers, we had to synchronise our schedules and I admit that must have been a huge headache to the person in charge.

But I guess no one is more disappointed than the students who were supposed to arrive in Malaysia. Imagine all the months of preparation just to get ready for this trip: shopping, packing, applying for visa, purchasing flight tickets, planning itinerary of food they want to eat and places they would like to visit. And to think that all that were crushed less than 5 days they were supposed to arrive in Malaysia! I felt truly sorry for them.

Even the other institution where I am supposed to have classes have decided to postpone their semester by a week, considering that many of their students are from mainland China.

All of a sudden, I find my work schedule being thrown into a washing machine and set on a high spin mode. This was certainly unexpected two weeks ago...

Nonetheless, my more rationale side knows deep down that such arrangements are better than having to expose students (or anyone for that matter) to the dangers of contracting Coronavirus, or being stranded away from home. Plus, this whole situation was really no one's fault.

Star Wars composer, John Williams

This incident also reminds me of my brother's trip to Europe two years ago. He had heard then that the great composer, John Williams, would be conducting the London Symphony Orchestra at the Royal Albert Hall, so he not only booked tickets to the concert eight months in advance, but also centered his entire three-week Europe trip around the date of the concert. Alas, while he was making his trip to Sweden just a few days before the concert, he learned that John Williams had arrived in England but had taken ill and therefore, could not make it for the much-awaited event!

No doubt my brother and his friends were highly disappointed. My brother, for one, had travelled half way around the world just to fulfill his lifelong dream of seeing John Williams live. Even so, one of his friends pointed out that the musicians for the concert would have been even more devastated considering they were looking forward to have John Williams be their conductor!

All these go to show that no matter how careful we may plan ahead, things may not always go according to our plan.

Did you think Kobe Bryant had no plans for his daughter? Yet, both of them perished in the blink of an eye. The same is true of many who are affected by the Coronavirus.

Major changes can indeed occur in the blink of an eye.

Those who are cheeky will suggest, "Then don't blink." But we cannot help it because blinking is a part of our human process to "clear away dust particles and spread lubricating fluids across the eyeball" (Mauk, 2012).

Plans may get thwarted, but that also means we should never take situations or even people for granted. Family members and friends whom we have just met during the recent CNY gathering may not necessarily be there next year. The peace and comfort that we experience today may not stay for tomorrow. The stable economy that we live in now may not remain for long. Case in point, even as I am writing this, Air Asia shares are plunging in response to a bribery scandal which was unheard of just three days ago.

As such, let us cherish what we have today and make the best of what life offers tomorrow.

Have a great midweek and always stay positive! 

A Harrowing Night

It may have been Halloween last night, but the past one month or so had been quite a harrowing experience for our entire family. It all started when Dad underwent a rather common surgery known as total knee replacement (TKR).

One of the things we have learnt from this experience is that no two operations are ever alike. Be it major or minor, the same surgery can have very different results on each individual. Just because a particular surgery had gone smoothly for one, there is no guarantee it will be the same for others.

Dad's knee replacement was rendered a success by the doctors and he was discharged within 5 days. There were some dark bruises on his leg, but he was assured that there was no blood clot or anything wrong with the operated leg, so he was allowed to go home. He was even able to walk around using his walking frame.

Nonetheless, he appeared to be extremely fatigued, which we attributed to lack of sleep during his stay at the hospital. At the same time, he had not regained his usual appetite, but again, we thought that was probably quite normal considering he had just undergone a surgery. Although he began spending quite some time in the toilet, we were not extremely worried because he has always had issues with his bowels.

On the fourth day of his discharge from the hospital, though, he started to behave rather differently. He demanded to double his mattress, raising it to almost the height of his waist. That irrational suggestion irritated the short-fused daughter (yours truly) who was rushing to get ready for work and I started berating him for that ridiculous idea.

As we exchanged heated words, however, I looked at my dad in the face and was suddenly shocked by his pale complexion. He was trying to argue back but could only manage to stutter and stammer in a very breathless manner. Although his scheduled checkup was in 2-3 days' time, we thought that perhaps it was better for him to make a visit to the Emergency Room (ER) just to see if he was alright.

I was not there during the first few hours at the ER. Thinking that perhaps Dad's condition was not too serious, I had left for class in college. When I was driving to join my brother at the ER in the evening, however, he called to inform that Dad had lost a lot of blood (something about his reading dropping drastically from 12 to 7) but the doctors were not sure where the bleeding was coming from. Internal bleeding?!!! My heart dropped, too. What did that mean? How did he suddenly take a turn for the worse from the moment I left him?

It took a gargantuan effort to hold back my tears when I saw Dad struggling uncomfortably on that short stretcher in the ER. I immediately regretted the harsh manner I had spoken to him just before leaving home. My mind started to wonder, "What if his bleeding does not stop? What if …? What if …? What if … ?"

In the midst of my fears and panic, a still small voice reminded me that God is still in control and that He is present even in the Emergency Room. I said a quick prayer for Dad. Strange, though, how much easier it was to look for the right words to pray for someone else's dad than one's own, especially when one was so desperate for a miracle then!

We were in the ER for quite some time since the doctors could not immediately identify the source of Dad's bleeding. Once in there, there was very little to do except to look around. It was then that I also gained a profound admiration for the doctors and nurses. Patient after patient were pushed in, yet these doctors patiently conducted test after test just to ensure that they had the right diagnosis for each case. Words could not describe the relief and triumph on their faces whenever one patient gets sent to the ward (which means they have managed to identify the problem and can safely hand over the patient to the right unit).

Occasionally, there were groups of doctors/housemen/trainees (not too sure what you call them) moving in rounds, analysing one case after another. They took turns to cross-check and query each other and this somehow assured us that the protocol was very thorough.

By midnight, they had pushed Dad to the Orthopedic ward. They suspected the bleeding to be from the operated leg. In any case, they had to transfuse 4 pints of blood to replace the blood which was lost.

Thus I spent the night accompanying Dad in the Male Orthopedic ward. Although it was way past midnight, doctors and nurses on duty kept coming to ask more questions about his symptoms and the medication he has taken. I guess, the time of the day has never been a factor at all to them since they were on duty at very odd hours anyway.

I looked around the ward, and was surprisingly comforted by a symphony of snores. No kidding, the other patients were deep in their sleep and collectively orchestrating a concert. It was definitely a change of scene from the Emergency Room hours ago. I muttered to myself rather smugly, "Wait till Papa recovers. He'll out-snore ALL of you!"  

The next few weeks saw Dad gradually recuperating in hospital while I tried a new career at being his Personal Food Panda, delivering meals from home as often as twice a day. While it was exhausting, I really thank the Lord that I still have the chance to serve Dad. The doctors later told Dad that had he arrived later, he could have suffered a heart attack due to insufficient blood supply! I shuddered at that thought, and thank the Lord for bringing Dad through the harrowing ordeal.

One other important lesson I have learnt through this experience is to appreciate our loved ones and to give our best while they are still around, for we do not know when the opportunity may be snatched from us.

Manners O Manners, Where art Thou?

A student accidentally dropped the loud speakers and one of his classmates immediately broke into applause. I glared at the latter incredulously and asked, "Are you sure you are a student of hospitality … because that was the worst thing you could have done!"

Now, I know that it was all in good fun and he had not meant any malice at all, but I was genuinely concerned that we have inadvertently allowed certain inappropriate behaviours to become a habit in us. That particular student, if left unchecked, may some day be the same hotel staff who will break into uncontrollable fits of laughter when a guest trips or drops something right in front of him. I can imagine the damage done to the reputation of both staff as well as the hotel.

Paying close attention to one's response is not exclusive to the hospitality industry alone. In fact, it is something that all of us have to do. Unfortunately, I observe that we have gradually taken the man out of manners. What does that even mean, you ask? We seem to lack basic qualities that justify our existence as part of humanity. The days of chivalrous knighthood may have long disappeared but it is sad to note that even basic manners have become rather extinct among us.

Elevator Etiquette 101

Take a ride in the lift, for example. How many of us would wait till others have exited before entering, or bother to hold the lift doors as we see someone trying to come in? Most would choose to either be glued to their positions, or be suddenly caught up with their mobile (which is an all-time fool-proof way of ignoring others). And if we end up being too far away from the button panel, how many of us remember to attach the magic words, PLEASE and THANK YOU, as we politely request for someone to press the button to the right floor? If you do, you can now take pride that you are an endangered species, indeed.

This always reminds me of a hilarious incident narrated by a colleague: A very strict lecturer known for her combo of large bulging eyes, frizzy hair, and a booming voice happened to be in the lift when a student walked in and casually uttered, "5th floor". I can imagine the lecturer's eyes on the verge of popping out of their sockets as she turned around, glowered at the student and reprimanded him loudly for not saying "please" or "thank you". And she had this simple truth to add, "Do you think we are put on earth just to press the lift buttons for you?!!!"

I am guessing that was the student's longest ride in any elevator, ever.

Perhaps it was my colleague's dramatic narration. Or perhaps it was just my fanciful imagination. Whatever it was, I laughed long and hard after hearing about that episode. Who wouldn't? Then I looked into the mirror and I immediately stopped laughing. Despite growing up with Enid Blyton's horror stories about kids who forget to mind their P's and Q's, I have to admit that I have also gradually become stingy with my "please" and "thank you".

It is easy for the younger generation to not familiarize themselves with the phrases "please" and "thank you" because many grow up with their 'kakak's i.e. housekeepers/baby sitters/maids etc. waiting for their commands at all times. When they observe their parents/grandparents/adults bossing kakak around without using 'please' and 'thank you', they mimic that behaviour/tone and bring the same attitude when they interact with their friends, adults, and strangers. Having said that, even those of us who did not grow up in such privileged environment have unknowingly omitted 'please' and 'thank you' in our daily conversation. You don't agree with me? Try paying close attention to your interaction. If at all, you discover that you have also been scrimping on 'please' and 'thank you', perhaps it is time for us to wonder why. Could it be possibly due to our increasing sense of entitlement? Have we become arrogant as we grow older?

Some may justify by saying, "We may not use 'please' and 'thank you' as often, but hey, at least we do not use profanities!" Has it ever occurred to us that using profanities is not necessarily the only way we display our lack of manners? Another bad habit we have is to not cover our mouths when we make all kinds of unpleasant noises i.e. burp, cough, and most of all, sneeze! I am guilty of forgetting to cover my mouth at times when I cough. While I agree that there is no excuse for such behaviour, I think it is only fair for me to state that I had once coughed for 5 whole months straight. After rounds of checkups, it was revealed to be a symptom of acid reflux, hence nothing contagious. Nonetheless, if I had as much as 2 cents for every single cough then, I would have been a millionaire by the second month. Initially, I had tried to cover my mouth with a tissue whenever I felt a cough coming up. After a while, though, it became such a nuisance that I finally took Elsa's advice from Frozen. You guessed it right … I let it go! 

Truth be told, whenever someone coughs or sneezes, my imagination runs on an overtime mode. I imagine droplets floating in the air, searching fervently for a new 'home'. You can now imagine my horror when I get stuck in a crowded public transport and someone coughs straight into my face! I would hold my breath till my face turns an unhealthy shade of blue. And before my respiratory system resumes itself, I would try to "blow" all these imaginary germs and droplets as far as possible.

But when a person sneezes loudly without turning away or covering his/her mouth, that is when I go totally berserk. It is no longer tiny droplets floating in the air that I have to evade. We are now referring to a jumbo spray akin to nuclear destruction that covers a 1.5 km radius. There is nothing you can do to escape. That, I think is quite an unimpressive move, I must say. So unimpressive that I recall an incident when a complete stranger waiting for the same lift at a shopping complex let out a loud sneeze/spray without covering his mouth, and I immediately scowled and went, "Eeewww!!!" He was surprised at my reaction and apologised profusely after that. He did not know that I was even more shocked by my own outburst! My brother said I was lucky that the stranger was not a member of a triad, else I would have had my facial features totally rearranged.

It does not take a genius to know that unwanted noise is always unwelcome anywhere. There is, therefore, no need to yell into one's mobile, or play loud videos in the public, no matter how amusing/educational/informative one may think it is. But what happens when the noise not only triggers your sense of hearing, but also your sense of smell?

I once saw a very well-dressed and attractive lady in high heels, intellectually browsing through some books at the shelves in a bookstore. After a while, she suddenly raised her right knee to her chest and let out a fart. A loud, boisterous, and possibly stinky fart. (You didn't expect me to check by taking a deep breath at that point, did you?) My jaw dropped. It was not so much about letting out a fart in public (after all, to quote Shrek, farts are always "better out than in"), but was it even necessary to lift her right knee thus? Did it make the process more satisfying, I wonder? She did not even have the audacity to check if the coast was clear nor showed any signs of remorse thereafter. Oh, the horror!

Where, O where, have our manners gone?

Well, if you are a Malaysian, you would surely know that our manners are almost non-existent on our Malaysian roads. Why else would we see so many motorists jumping queues, tailgating, double-parking, and getting involved in road rage? Similarly, we have pedestrians who take their own sweet time and never look up from their phone while crossing the road, under the infamous Malaysian assumption that it is, after all, their "grandfather's road"!

I asked around to find out more about other ill manners that are unbearable and the answer ranges from meeting dishonest sales clerks to people who hog public space using their bags etc. Some are easily agitated by callers who ask, "Who are you?" (despite being the one who initiated the call). Then there are also some who are highly disappointed when others do not greet them (this is especially true among the elderly). My mom gets irritated at the very sight of people walking around obliviously with earphones or headphones.

A friend made an interesting observation the other day when she asked, "Isn't our Asian culture one that is supposedly based on bersopan-santun (propriety and good manners)? Why do we find it so challenging to hold the door for others, or to acknowledge the other person's presence with a smile? Will it kill us?"

My observation is this: Manners can be quite relative. Something that seems highly offensive to us may not appear to be so in the eyes of the offender. The bar may be lowered, but there is still a bottom line that all of us eventually hit before we collectively agree that a certain action is plain rude and unacceptable.

On the other hand, when one has higher standards than usual, he/she may come across as more appealing. I recall a well mannered part-time lecturer who always minta diri (excuses himself) before leaving. While most of us would try to sneak out in the middle of a meeting, he would politely request for permission to be excused. Now, that is super classy! A reflection of excellent upbringing, indeed! How often have we dropped by our friends' homes or attended parties and have just disappeared without first thanking the host and requesting for permission to leave?

On that note, I shall end with this, "Thank you for reading this rant. If you would excuse me, I wish to take leave." =P

SPM: What's Next?

It has been more than a week since the SPM results were released. By now, those who were happy or anywhere near contented would have already had their fair share of celebration. Likewise, those who had expected better results would have overcome their 'grief' and disappointment.

I am sure the days leading up to the release of the results must have been nerve-wracking. Decades ago, my friends and I shared the same anxiety. Even the candidate who is usually an atheist would suddenly say, "We must pray very hard" while others would cheekily reply, "It's too late to pray now. Should have prayed harder back when we were sitting for the exams!"

One of my friends' mother offered the best advice, "The results are secondary. What you do with the results is far more important." How very true!

To be honest, most students are left at the crossroads after sitting for major exams. As if the entire ordeal of choosing between Arts Stream and Science Stream back in Form Four was not stressful enough, one has to decide what to do after SPM. And the worst part?

You are either extremely sure of what you would like to do, or you are one of the majority who simply have got no clue. 

So if you happen to fall into the second category, don't fret yet. Rest assured that it is absolutely normal NOT to be certain of your choices at this point. That is why you should explore the possibilities out there.

As much as I hate being on edufair duties, I have to acknowledge the importance of providing accurate and adequate information to both parents and students who are still searching for the most suitable academic pathway. Thus I have decided to pen my point-of-view in this blog entry, in case anyone out there wants a slightly clearer picture. 

*A note of disclaimer, though: I am not a professional education counsellor. Instead I am merely an ordinary lecturer who has had years of observation behind the booths at education fairs. 

First of all, you need to know the different pathways after SPM. Here are a few of the more popular choices:

a) work and gain experience

b) local matriculation or public university programmes

c) STPM i.e. Form 6

d) Diploma

e) A-Levels

f) Foundation

g) American Degree Program

Do bear in mind that options (b) to (f) are all considered PRE-university courses, which means you will only enroll for a Degree course AFTER you have completed one of these. 

a) Work and gain experience

Let's face it, not everyone is cut out for studying. It goes against the principles of an educator to make such remarks but I have seen too many students who have been forced to study but either do not have that aptitude or passion for the academics. Needless to say, they end up repeating their courses and wasting the time they could have used to gain experience elsewhere. 

Do not get me wrong, it is also not that these individuals do not have any intelligence. On the contrary, these students are usually much more streetwise and creative. One just has to acknowledge that their intelligence and talent lies in other areas. If that be true, wouldn't it make much more sense to discover the areas of their strengths and nurture them instead? 

b) Local matriculation or public university programmes 

Honestly I am not too familiar with this particular pathway anymore. During our time, matriculation was solely reserved for bumiputra candidates, but there were other 'program asasi' which promised between 1-1.5 years of foundation before entering a 3 year degree course in a public university. The last I checked, the matriculation course may have opened its doors to non-bumiputras as well. I should think school teachers may have more information on that. It is definitely more affordable, but your results have to be really good, and you will have to be prepared to study locally. 

Advantages:

• much more affordable, considering it is a local course
• paves the way to secure a place in public university
• not too long (usually 1-1.5 years); faster than entering public university via STPM

Disadvantages:

• only good results will be considered
• courses may be quite limited
• if you do not enjoy or are not familiar with the local setting, you may have a hard time fitting in

c) STPM i.e. Form 6

If you are the slightly more studious type who are good at continuously looking at books and want to save cost by studying locally, this would be a good choice. It may take a bit longer than other pathways, but the advantage is that you become more mature while waiting to discover your preferences, thus making more informed choices later on. 

However, if you do not enjoy studying or are sick of the school environment, you should consider staying away from this option. There has been a misconception that your certificate goes to waste if you do not get a place in a local university. That is absolutely untrue. As long as you have 2 principle passes in STPM, you should be able to enroll in a Degree programme at any private college.

Advantages:

• cost effective
• provides opportunity to enroll in public universities
• buys time -- to slowly discover your interest and also be more mature
• direct entry to Year 1 of Degree (no need for Foundation)

Disadvantages:

• longer duration (Lower 6 only starts mid-year and STPM will be at the end of the following year). Total = 2 years before enrolling into a degree programme
• if your results are average and you do not get into a local university, you can still enroll directly into the first year of degree in a private college, but the journey takes longer than a foundation programme 

d) Diploma

Diploma is often underrated because the entry requirement is lower than that for Foundation or A-Levels. One needs a minimum of 3 credits in SPM (in contrast to the conventional 5 credits) to enroll into a Diploma course, which usually lasts for another 2 years. The good news is that you can go straight into the 2nd year of the Degree programme once you have completed your Diploma. Do make sure that your credits are transferable, though. Some may not recognize certain subjects and you will have to re-take them. 

Advantages: 

• lower entry requirement (3 credits in SPM)
• direct entry to Year 2 of Degree upon completion

Disadvantages:

• not eligible for PTPN yet (please check, though)
• sometimes (though not always) the quality of education may be slightly diluted to cater to students who come in with a lower entry requirement

e) A Levels

This is quite similar to STPM, except it is an international exam. Many people who take A-Levels have somewhat set their eyes on furthering their education abroad. This does not mean that you must necessarily study overseas. It just gives you the option to do that. Again, if you suddenly find your initial plan to study abroad changing due to some financial setback, you can always choose to enroll in a private university back in Malaysia. Just be sure to get at least 2 passes. 

Advantages:

• internationally standardized and recognized 
• provides the opportunity to enroll in universities abroad

Disadvantages:

• cost can range from affordable to very expensive, depending on the college that you have chosen (please shop well)
• needs at least 5 credits in SPM
• takes approximately 1.5 years (if you pass all your papers) 
• very exam-based

f) Foundation

This is considered one of the more conventional choices for various reasons. First, its duration is shorter than STPM. It usually takes around 1 to 1.5 years to complete the course, after which you can enroll into a 3-year Degree programme. Some Foundation programmes are a bit more specific (Foundation in Psychology, Foundation in Business, Foundation in Mass Communication etc.), but you can always opt to take more general ones like Foundation in Arts or Foundation in Science. 

If you ask me, I personally find this pathway much more manageable than STPM or A Levels. Passing rate is certainly much higher. After all, it is designed to serve as a feeder into the college's Degree programmes. Some (but not all) foundation programmes allow you to pursue a course in another university (even abroad). You will need to get the info accurately from the particular college first. 

Advantages:

• less stressful in comparison to STPM or A Levels
• more exposure to various subjects
• aims to prepare students for Degree courses within the same educational institution
• shorter duration (1 - 1.5 years)

Disadvantages:

• not every foundation programme is transferable to other institutions
• classes tend to be quite large
• needs at least 5 credits in SPM 

g) American Degree Program

American Degree Program is most likely the only program that allows you to have direct entry into a Degree course right after SPM. It is very popular among students who tend to fare better in projects and assignments instead of final exam. This is because the weightage for written final exam is much lower. The entire program usually lasts for 4 years, which makes it one of the fastest pathways. 

The entry requirement is also a minimum of 5 credits in SPM. There are programs where you can complete all 4 years here in Malaysia (ADP), but most of them are 2+2 (ADTP = American Degree Transfer Program) i.e. 2 years here, and another 2 years in the States. You would just need to check with the respective colleges. 

Advantages: 

• one of the fastest pathways i.e. 4 years from SPM to completion of a Degree
• less exam oriented; very suitable for students who perform better in projects and assignments
• excellent exposure to many different fields i.e. breath vs. depth of knowledge

Disadvantages:

• fees are usually quite dependent on currency exchange rate
• not suitable for students who prefer to go for depth instead of breadth of knowledge
• the first year is NOT eligible for PTPTN (but please check)

There you go. I really hope the options above can give you a rough picture on what to expect when you drop by at education fairs. It is good to have a basic idea, otherwise you will be easily swayed by the marketing promotions out there. Remember, it is YOUR education, so YOU will have to make the decision. 

I wish I can provide information on other courses such as AUSMAT (Australian Matriculation) etc. but I have yet to teach that. 

All the best in making your decisions. I pray that you have the wisdom to choose one that you will enjoy and excel in. 

Confessions of a Chronic Hoarder

If I were to die today I may go to heaven, but those who are still living will have one hell of a time going through my possessions. 

I confess, I am a hoarder. Aren't we all?

With the recent Chinese New Year spring cleaning and the sudden explosion of Marie Kondo's popularity on the Internet, everyone seems to be obsessed with discarding items that no longer "spark joy" (to quote the KonMari expert).

As I looked around my room, I have to admit that I do hoard quite a lot of unnecessary items. 

a) The JIC (Just-in-case) Wares

I am guilty of hoarding many JIC (just-in-case) wares. For instance, I tend to collect small refillable bottles/containers just in case I ever decide to travel and need to transfer some shampoo, conditioner, body wash, lotion, etc. into smaller containers. It will be both uneconomical and un-environmental friendly to purchase new matching bottles solely for that purpose, won't it?

And then, of course, there are those half-scribbled journals and old diaries with some remaining pages on which I could probably use to record very important events/reminders ... some day in the future. What about notes from my uni days? Of course I still have them! Who knows if I may end up teaching these subjects and will need such info again? Did you say books? Classic, fiction, non-fiction, reference. You name it, I would most likely have it in my collection. After all, I may just get to fulfil my childhood dream of opening a neighbourhood library some day. If all else fails, we can always set all these papers ablaze in a makeshift fireplace to keep us warm when it freezes over in Malaysia.  

What about old and faded office wear? To be honest, they are not exactly comfortable enough for home despite the downgrade. But if there is any likelihood of a war in the near future, I may not have the time and money to shop for new clothes. These apparels would certainly come in very handy then.

I know I am not alone in this. I have heard of other people who keep old spectacles, tattered rags, broken furniture, and many other unusual just-in-case wares. In fact, I was just chatting with a group of friends the other day and one of them said that her father collects the stuff that she has specifically selected to be discarded and stashes them in his own home instead (in case there is any use for it). Her husband also shared about his father who has the habit of keeping many spare items in his house. Although concerned family members may occasionally nag him about it, they will usually shut up whenever he is able to pull out the exact replacement item that they need, thus helping them to save cost.

No matter how you look at it, hoarders of JIC items will always have a "valid" reason for keeping their wares. Hmm... what about the items that tug at your emotions? Do you throw them away?

b) Trash or Treasure?

Being a sucker for anything nostalgic, I struggle to part with things that have special meaning or were given by special people. (Of course by special people, I actually mean 75 percent of the human population!) I still have soft toys which were given to my brother when he was a one year-old baby, which means the toys have been on earth longer than I personally have. How does one give those away, especially when soft toys used to be expensive and something which our parents could hardly afford?

And because I clearly remember the giver(s) of each soft toy in my collection, I cannot bring myself to part with them. After watching Toy Story, I am convinced that my decision to keep them is still the best. There is just one slight flaw, though --- more toys kept coming into my possession. Would you like to read about the birth of a nation, in particular, the birth of the toy nation on my office desk?

I had somehow managed to collect two Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles figurines from McDonalds many years ago. A colleague saw that Raphael and Leonardo were missing from the lot, so she decided to get them for me as my birthday gift. Yet another group of colleagues spied these 'heroes in a hard shell' of mine and decided to get me another Lego-like set of Ninja Turtles, complete with flashlights at the sole of their webbed feet. My students eventually identified my desk as "the one with the Ninja Turtles". Yeah kids, that is where you should submit your assignments.

A few cars from my collection

The same thing happened with toy cars. I have always loved toy cars but was too stingy to purchase them on my own. After much deliberation, I finally convinced myself to get a shiny black die-cast BMW from Mr. DIY and placed it on my desk so that I can imagine myself taking a spin in it whenever work gets too dreary. A colleague's young son also loved that car very much and often played with it whenever he dropped by. Guess what his mother did when she happened to pick my name for Christmas gift exchange one year? She bought me another toy car! On the following birthday, the colleague who sat next to me bought a white 4WD to accompany the black BMW. My desk had become a regular carpark by then. Just before I left the company, a few colleagues pooled in some money and got me an entire fleet of cars! I now have enough capital to open an auto garage!

Some people call them collectibles. Others regard them as garbage. Some people deliberately purchase fancy glass cabinets to display their collection. I know of another who is dedicated enough to actually blog about the plane models that he puts together. No matter how you look at it, this saying is true: One man's trash is another man's treasure. 

Some of these collectibles are investment-worthy and may fetch a high price when it is sold in future. Case in point, I have a cousin who now makes profit from the rare, special edition toys he used to own as a kid. Of course these have been kept in mint condition. But there is another form of collectibles that money can never buy --- encouraging words from friends and loved ones. It is not surprising then that a friend keeps greeting cards, mementos, emails, and letters she has received from others. I was also surprised to find a small yet overflowing box of letters that I had exchanged with friends, cousins, and pen-pals since I was eleven. Reading them again made me smile at the innocence I once had, although some, of course, left me cringing in embarrassment!

Move aside, Marie Kondo! It is just impossible to kill the nostalgy in some of us.

c) The Excessive Essentials

Have you ever bought a bottle of detergent (because it was on offer), only to realise that there are already three bottles waiting for you at home? That, my friends, is yet another form of hoarding, albeit unintentionally. Or perhaps you clearly recall purchasing an item but cannot seem to locate it just when you really needed it? What do you do then? Do you spend a whole lifetime searching for it, or do you just grab a new one from the supermarket/hardware store/mall?

I am not a neat freak, but there are a few specific cleaning agents that I especially like to use, so whenever I see them at an affordable price, I would be tempted to get a few. One day, I opened the old kitchen cabinet (which our family had decided to not throw but hoard) in the storeroom and was greeted by this sight:

Enough stock for me to open a franchise

I had not realized that I could already open my own Cosway franchise at home! To be honest, it was just a nasty reminder that I have been spending too much time and money purchasing cleaning agents and not enough time doing the actual cleaning.

There was also another time when by some strange magic we ended up with 3 can openers in the house. These items are essential, but probably not worth duplicating (at least, not that often). It may be slightly different if it were food, though. Or would it? A friend of mine hoards dry food, tea, and coffee. I guess if an emergency is suddenly declared, she will certainly not go hungry. I used to keep a "darurat" (emergency) stash in the office, too. Cup noodles, Campbell soup, canned corn, sardines, tuna etc, I had them all. The plus point is that these foods have expiry dates printed on the packaging, so anything that is past the dates can then be forcefully migrated into the dustbin.

At this point, there is no arguing that hoarding is an extremely bad habit. But one of my cousins suggested an interesting, worthy item to hoard -- money. Now, that is not too bad a motivation! I was just thinking that perhaps that is the only item I have not hoarded so far. Then a guilty feeling immediately took over as I recall stacks of crispy ang pau dollar notes I had quietly stashed (and still have) in my drawer, and had refused to exchange with my mom when she was desperate for new notes to put into the little red packets. There is just something nice and addictive when it comes to the crisp and smell of fresh new notes.

When I look at the things I have hoarded, I think I am quite chronic in the eyes of Marie Kondo. But I guess it's normal. Or is it not? Maybe I should stop blogging here and start decluttering, eh?

Have a good weekend!