A Dash of This and That: Japan: Through the Eyes of a Tourist

My recent visit to the land of the rising sun was certainly an eye-opener. Here are FIVE general observations about people in Osaka and Kyoto during winter:

Observation #1

In Japan, winter can actually be a fashionable affair.

Granted that we Chinese tend to have a similar tone in terms of complexion and somewhat share the same slanted eyes, my family and I couldn’t really blend into the Japanese crowd. You see, it was our ‘winter apparels’ which were a complete giveaway.

In Japan, the locals saunter the streets and corridors in fashionable coats, jackets, shoes/boots, hats, and warmers. Both men and women actually look smart and professional and none of them would dream of taking off their smart winter wear even when confined in a heated building or a train. They are highly capable of looking presentable 24/7 both indoors and outdoors.

Yes, women do wear short-skirts in winter

In stark contrast, since we did not really know what to expect of the weather in Osaka/Kyoto, and winter wear in Malaysia costs a bomb, we decided to only wear a pair of long johns wrapped with layers and layers of t-shirts beneath our sweaters. We ended up looking like the abominable snowman. The layers kept us warm throughout but whenever we reached the hotel, we would start peeling off our clothing like layers of an onion. Our lack of couture was certainly a tell-tale sign that we were not one of the locals.

Observation #2

Japanese girls look like identical dolls manufactured from the same factory.

People always say that girls/guys from other ethnics all look the same. This statement may seem stereotypical and racist but if you have ever been to Japan, you will probably agree with me. Yes, I am talking about the typical anime wanna-be looking girls. One can find many young nymphs with long brown hair (thanks to an extensive assortment of hair dye), extraordinarily large pupils (thanks to rows of fancy-schmancy contact lenses in shopping complexes), and forest-thick eyelashes (thanks to layers of falsies), all contrasted against a flawless complexion (I hope this is their original genetic make-up or a result of the cool climate, and not merely due to high quality cosmetics).

I am not kidding. The truth is, 9.5 out of every 10 Japanese girls have their hair dyed brown. In fact, you can almost always be sure that the raven-haired female in the crowd is a tourist and not a local. If you think that this craze is only limited to young girls, oh boy, you are wrong! Even mature working adults tend to adopt this ‘kawaii’ look. From a close range, some of these women could be in their late 30s or even 40s. In fact, I suspect that they will be able to maintain this cute girly look till they suddenly wake up one day and morph into a wrinkly 100 year-old woman.

Brown-haired Japanese beauties are aplenty in Osaka

It is natural for one to appreciate beauty, so it was initially a delectable experience to see these women walking past us. Nonetheless, even the best desserts would seem too overwhelming when consumed too much. But then again, I am only speaking from the biased view of an envious woman who shares none of their features mentioned above. =) If you are a guy who is looking for a place to “mencuci mata”, Japan is surely a place to go, for I can assure you that your plane ticket here will be worth its every cent.

Observation #3

What about the guys, then? All I can say is this: Japanese men come in two different packages.

I have a confession to make. I spent much of my after school hours entertaining my crushes on Japanese guys: Ultraman and Ksatria Baja Hitam (I know, what kinda name is that anyway?).

Ultraman: A hero who is constantly defeated by monsters before his heart starts beeping

Ksatria Baja Hitam, literally translated as "Black Fertilized Knight"?

I loved them in their gears but that was only because I knew how they looked like as humans beneath their exaggerated costume. And frankly, how can one say no to a guy with fabulous hair, who moves around on a grasshopper-looking two-wheeler?

Part of me was hoping to catch a glimpse of such guys but I guess my taste was already too outdated for that advanced country. I have instead encountered two groups of men. The first group of Japanese men were those who were of average height, have typically Asian-slanted eyes, yellow complexion, and bushy eyebrows. I personally found the second group with large eyes, an extraordinary height akin to NBA players, and a tinge of blue beneath their fair complexion much more attractive. In short, they were able to transform features that looked horrid on Robert Pattinson to their utmost advantage instead. Like their female counterparts, they look equally fashionable as they tower past in their long trench coats, carrying a briefcase, and having a great sense of purpose to their gait.

Oh, and did I mention that Japan is probably the only place on earth where a guy can actually get away with sling bags?

Observation #4

Sexy Japanese school-girls may be a myth after all.

I have had just about enough guys sharing to me their personal fantasies of sexy Japanese school-girls. Naturally, I was on the lookout for Sailormoon-looking girls in marine uniforms or at least super-duper short checkered skirts, but I was deeply disappointed.

There were not many schoolgirls in the first place. Perhaps I have been hanging around at places where there were no girls’ school, or perhaps these girls have changed out of their uniforms the moment they walked out of the school compound. But then again, if their uniforms were that sexy, why would they want to change out of it? I would jolly well go to bed in such uniform (if I had the right figure, that is).

I have, however, seen many schoolboys in black coats and slacks. Even their teachers who escorted them on outdoor trips to tourist attractions wore matching black jackets and slacks. The few schoolgirls I had encountered were dressed in black coats and calf-length skirts. This could be due to the winter but I guess I would have to make another trip here in summer to see if sexy Japanese school-girls do exist indeed.

A group of school children queuing up to have lunch in a restaurant before school starts

Observation #5

Sumo wrestlers do not roam the streets of Japan.

Contrary to popular belief, sumo wrestlers are not a common sight in Japan. Before the trip, I was anticipating lots of sushi meals, pretty Japanese girls in kimono, and live encounters with sumo wrestlers but to my dismay, none of these were fulfilled. I never had a single sushi meal; I had only seen at most 4 Japanese ladies in kimonos (the others were mainly tourists playing dress-up); and I did not get to see a sumo wrestler in person.

If I must be very honest, I would have to say that my family and I were the ‘sumo wrestlers’ in the midst of the fittest society in the world. Everywhere we looked, we see lean mean Japanese machines marching briskly past us. This comes as a surprise if you were to look at their regular portion of a meal. It is only common to have a plate of rice accompanying a large bowl of noodles as part of a meal. I would have to say that this is certainly equivalent to two Malaysian portions.

See how lean everyone looks be it in the city or the country?

Rice + Noodle: A typical serving of Japanese meal

With the amount of carb that they swallow (yes, they ingest food at a record pace), you would assume that they would be fat, lazy, and sedentary but this is not true. You know why? They walk A LOT. In fact, they walk so much that if the earth were not round, the Japanese would be the first people to fall off the earth. Those who do not walk end up cycling, instead. One can see rows of bicycles along the streets. Cars are rare and highly un-prestigious.