When St. Valentine meets Chap Goh Mei

There is evidently something cruel in the air that causes relatives and friends to be extra nosy, extra noisy, and also extra naggy during Chinese New Year. Sure enough, year after year Chinese singles will always be plagued with questions like "Why aren't you married?", "Don't you want to look for a partner?", "Don't study too much, else nobody wants you", "You think you're still young, ah?", "Told you to go lose some weight", "Go get your nose fixed and your Prince Charming will come," blah, blah, blah.

 

I have had many years of handling such situations. In fact, I think I have become an expert in this area. Either of these two options has always worked fine for me: a) shutting these people up with some offensive remark, b) shutting my own ears by choosing not to hear anything.

 

I find it highly amusing, though, whenever they say, "Make sure this is your last year to receive ang pow from me, ah?" My mind goes, "Seriously? But why? You mean you're not planning to live till next Chinese New Year? What a pity!" O_o

 

Mandarin oranges complete with contact details

Every year, I get many 'reminders' from non-Chinese male friends (who seem to regard this whole business as a joke) to throw mandarin oranges into the river/lake/pool/bath tub during Chap Goh Mei. If you are not familiar with this weird custom, you may want to read this: http://www.thestar.com.my/story.aspx/?file=%2f2012%2f2%2f6%2fcentral%2f10680941

 

In short, the person who picks up the oranges from the other side of the lake/river/what have you will be a perfect match for the thrower.

Well, if I had a good mandarin orange in my hand, I wouldn't throw it into any river. The orange would have been in and out of my digestive system before anyone even knows it.

When St. Valentine meets Chap Goh Mei

 

I suppose that the pressure may have intensified for many single men and women this year because Chap Goh Mei coincides with St. Valentine's Day celebration. I, on the other hand, am just pretty contented so long as I have received my 15 days' worth of ang pow, and eaten all the mandarin oranges and cookies.

 

But just in case any keh poh chee (busybody) chooses to ask me those questions again this year, I will certainly direct that person to this particular blog entry where I will provide 10 reasons why I am not a shopaholic. What has shopping got to do with being single? If you had ever gone shopping with me, you will have a clue. And with a pinch of imagination, you will be able to read this list as 10 reasons why I am still single or not in a relationship, instead.

 

 

#1 I have never fancied shopping

Unlike most girls, I do not dream of shopping. If there is a shop nearby, and there is something I need, I will walk in. I have never spent sleepless nights over shopping.

 

 

#2 I do not hang around at the right shopping malls

I tend to patronize obscure stores where the majority would not even enter.

 

 

#3 People call me a fussypot shopper

I can spend hours just to choose 10 apples. If I am paying for the apples, they jolly well better be flawless, or at least the best 10 apples of the lot.

 

 

#4 I may end up not purchasing anything even after trying something for a thousand times

'Peng' (inexpensive), 'leng' (beautiful), 'zheng' (attractive) has always been my policy.  

 

 

#5 Yes, sometimes I do go home with regrets of not buying something

I would imagine how life would be like if I had purchased that product.

 

 

#6 But the very next time when I do go back and am determined to buy, it is no longer as satisfying

 

 

#7 I tend to get distracted

Oh, the times when I would set out to replace a torn handbag only to come home with a pair of new shoes instead!  

 

 

#8 I am never around when there is a major sale

Not that I am rich, but I tend to get claustrophobic. I do not shop when others do.

 

 

#9 I have got the most peculiar taste

I only use a certain brand and particular design of toothbrush.

 

 

#10 I often find that I am not the right fit

All my life, I have hardly had any clothes, shoes, or bags that fit me well. I am not of the regular size where I can easily get things off the shelves. I cannot squeeze into a pair of size 5 shoes if my feet are actually a size 8, can I? 

 

 

Snobbish? Perhaps. Have I looked at myself in the mirror lately? Contrary to what you may think, I have. More often than not, though, shopping is not just about the shopper but also about the shops around the vicinity. Sometimes, the shopper may be denied entry into certain shops due to impropriate dressing or behaviour.

 

One good habit that I hold on to, though? I don't look into other people's shopping cart when I am in a shop. Okay, perhaps I may be guilty of now and then stealing a quick glance at the counter when it is already too late but that is all there is to it. Else all you nosy aunties and attached keh poh chee (busybodies) would have to hold on dearly to your partner. =P

 

So if you have a partner this year, I wish you a Happy Valentines' Day and Happy Chap Goh Mei but there is no need to sulk big time if you do not. Life still has to go on. And you know what? It can still be as beautiful.