A Case of Too Many Lilians

 

 

Warning: This entry will seem extremely narcissistic (not that it is any different from other entries) but then again, how many Lilians do you actually have in your contact? Go on, scroll down the name list in your phone, email, or Facebook account, and I am pretty sure that I am NOT the only Lilian that you know.

As I was growing up, I always thought that my parents and paternal grandfather had given me a rather unique name. Apart from a Chinese name (瑞 玉) that many tend to mispronounce and misinterpret as Roast Pork (it actually means Beautiful Jade, mind you), my parents had fortunately enough foresight to include my English name, Lilian, in my birth certificate, thus saving me from a lifetime of being known as Lil' Ms Roast Pork.

 

Disclaimer: This picture is for decoration purposes only. You will find nothing offensive here. Please move on.

 



LILIAN does sound quite unusual, or so I thought. I have come across many variations of Annie, Jenny, Jessica, Melissa, Michelle, and Mary. In fact, they are almost as many as the Jonathans, Joshuas, Daniels, Kelvins, and Michaels out there. The only other time I used to see my name in print (besides my school name tag) was at the lingerie section in departmental stores ...

 

In the early years of my school life, I never had to share my name with anyone else in any of the classes or even throughout the entire school. In fact, it was only through the duty roster pinned on the notice board that my classmates and I eventually discovered that there was another Lilian who occupied the same classroom in the first session. (We had two sessions in primary school back then: morning and afternoon.) Although we eventually went to the same secondary school, it never really proved to be a problem because both of us were neither in the same class nor were we ever one of the popular students. I can only recall one minor instance of confusion when the other Lilian was supposed to have her name (and not mine) announced via the school PA system because she had been late to school and had to see the principal or the disciplinary teacher. As they had mentioned the wrong class (she was in 4K5 and I was in 4K4), I had to convince the person-in-charge that I was not the 'perpetrator' they were looking for.  

 

Throughout Form 6 and university, I was back to being the exclusive Lilian once again. Nonetheless, things changed tremendously the moment I chose to work in educational institutions. Apparently, there are too many Lilians in the academic world, both in the administrative as well as academic positions.

 

There were at least 3 Lilians roaming the halls of the first educational institution that I worked at: one was in the Department of Student Affairs, and the other was a coordinator in the Faculty of Medicine. To make things worse, the second Lilian even shared my surname i.e. Leong. It was still difficult to guess which Lilian they meant when our surnames were included. They had to be more specific i.e. Lilian Leong the Coordinator, or Lilian Leong the Lecturer! That unofficial title sometimes put me at par with the likes of Conan the Barbarian.

 

It was, therefore, not unusual to have e-mails directed to the wrong Lilian. On a positive note, though, because of our different positions, it was never too challenging to review the contents of the mails and redirect them to the right person:

a) minutes of meetings and admin stuff  => Lilian the Coordinator

b) forms, orders of T-shirts, trips etc  => Lilian from Student Affairs

c) students' apology for not submitting assignments on time etc. => me.

 

There were times when we would let the emails bounce around before we finally figured out whom the actual recipient was. I had even received a Christmas gift which I think was not meant for me in the first place, considering that I was not very close to the sender. Since none of the other Lilians claimed it, I decided to give it to someone else. Why did I do that, uh? Well, it was a bar of chocolate and I was afraid that it may have been poisoned ...

 

This confusion escalated at my current workplace. Here, instead of 3, there were 4 Lilians at one point. When I first joined, there was already a Dr. Lilian Chan who was the head of another department. The first question we had for each other was, "Does your name have one "L" or double "L"s in the middle?" You see, we were hoping that the other party has double L, which would mean that person is known as Lillian instead of Lilian. Sure, it does not make a lot of difference, but we were desperate to find a way to distinguish between the both of us. When that failed, I resorted to, "Oh, she's the one with the Dr. in front of her name. I am just an ordinary nurse!"

 



Dr. Lilian

 

Nurse Lilian

 



 

Not long after, another staff, Lee Lian joined the Bursary department, followed by Li Lian who (horror of all horrors) also teaches English. Even though their names are spelt differently from ours, they still sound pretty much the same when escaped from anyone's lips. At the beginning of each semester, I will always introduce myself as the Ms. Lilian who sits in the 4th floor staff room, and not Ms Li Lian who sits in the 5th floor staff room. The fact that both of us teach English makes it even more challenging to our students.

 

The plot thickened when both Li Lian and I were transferred from our respective departments to a new department. To make matters worse, we now sit next to each other on the 5th floor. I have since stopped trying to explain to students. I will just threaten them, "Please make sure you get the right Lilian. If you submit your assignments to the wrong Lilian, it's not my fault." When anyone enters the staff room to look for Lilian, we will just ask, "Which one?" Even then, it is not an easy task. One former colleague labeled Li Lian as, "Oh, the small size one?" which then makes me "the XL version."

By now, we have become immune to phrases like the two Lilians, the other Lilian, your namesake etc. Once, the both of us sent an email to each other and right next to the names, we included an arrow and the words "this is me" and "this is you". This is one Li Lian that I am glad to share my name with.

I had suspected that perhaps there was something special with the name Lilian back in the 70s and 80s. Why else would so many parents name their daughter thus? Perhaps there was a really cool celebrity named Lilian during that period. Or perhaps there is a wonderful meaning attached to that name. I decided to consult my parents. To my disappointment, my dad replied with a deadpan face, "We just wanted a name that rhymed with your brother's name." (My brother's name is Gideon, and true enough, Lilian does rhyme with Gideon.)

I suppose none of these is as amusing as what I am about to tell you.

A Case of Mistaken Identity

A student from my previous workplace added me on Facebook sometime this year. I could not recall her looks or any outstanding traits (which I usually try to attach to each student in my class) but I was sure of the name, even right down to her surname. She said she had been searching for ways to contact me and was glad that I was on Facebook. She also added that it was such a loss for the current students because they could not be under my tutelage. At that point, my ego was about to burst. This sweet girl then proceeded to send me an invitation to her wedding and was really looking forward to meet up with me and her classmates.

I thought that perhaps my memory had started to fail me, for I could remember very little about the things she had said. One day, she sent me a photograph of her and her classmates. She asked if I could remember any of the others in the photo. It was then that everything fell into place. In the group picture she had posted, there was the other Ms. Lilian --- a part-timer who had also taught the Mass Communication students.

I burst out laughing because I had no clue she had been referring to the wrong Ms. Lilian all these while. You mean, all the compliments she had showered wasn't for me? It looked like there were, after all, 4 and not 3 Lilians at the first educational institution I worked with! It was not surprising for this former student to mistaken me as the other Ms Lilian because I did not have any of my personal photos as my profile picture on Facebook. The reason I remembered her name was because it had appeared in the attendance list. She could have deferred, dropped that subject, or might even have been designated to the other lecturer that particular semester. We laughed long and hard over it. She said this story is certainly worth blogging.

So here's wishing Lai Fu Wei who is tying the knot today, "Congratulations on your wedding! May you find your other Ms. Lilian soon!"

Congratulations, Fu Wei!